I decided to go out of town for the next few days. Since Chris and my buddies will be working during the week, I took the time off to be by myself. I rented a Toyota Corolla Altis and randomly drove to the beach. The four walls of my suite had become too confining. I've almost memorized each speck of dust in the room. So I brought along a backpack and chose to experience the great outdoors of my beloved country.
I almost forgot how wonderful the Philippines is. Despite its widespread of poverty and excruciating heat, there's no place like home. Moving to the States was never a personal choice, nor was I forced against my will. I kind of understood where my parents where coming from. And I love them enough to come with. Just like any Filipino family abroad, my parents saw America as a land of opportunities--a chance to better our lives. We were just an average family though--not entirely financially challenged. My dad managed a restaurant his family had owned. My grandfather treated Sam's Place as one of his children. And when it was time for dad to take over, he did the same. My mother, on the other hand, was head nurse at the local hospital. You know where this is going. Immediate hiring of Filipino nurses for international hospitals became my mom's ticket to the U.S. A few months later, my dad and sister Jenny, followed. I had to stay one more year to finish my degree and get my license. We settled in pretty quickly. My family is based in New Jersey. Mom still practices nursing at Greenville Hospital, while my dad is involved with business plans of relocating Sam's Place in West Side Avenue. Side by side, they continue taking care of Jenny, who is in her senior year in New Jersey City University taking up multicultural studies. I would visit them during the weekends as we have our regular family dinner, with my mom heading the kitchen. She would serve traditional Filipino dishes to keep us grounded on our roots. She makes the meanest pork adobo by the way--tender, succulent meat packed with the perfect balance of soy sauce and vinegar. We were nothing less than a happy family living in an urban neighborhood abroad. But this...I thought as the soft summer breeze brushed through my skin... Nothing ever beats the fresh air of your own country intoxicating your lungs.There's definitely no place like home.
My gaze turned to scan the sea. No waves today. Perfect and still as a painting. A flock of birds flew overhead, exploring the vast skies. I took a walk by the shore, letting the sand grab imprints of my feet. I found a half-buried tree stump to sit on. The beach was almost deserted. It was just me, a boy flying his kite, and a couple. The guy had his arm wrapped around the girl, while she rested her head on his shoulder. They were engaged in a conversation. Probably appreciating the scene as much as I was. I can tell they were in love. The guy offered his hand for her to hold and headed back to the cabins. Their image triggered a memory of me and my girlfriend in college. Yes, I did fall in love again. Abby and I were classmates in an English class. We were together for a year and eight months, almost nine. Not to compare but she was a lot like Trish. Laid-back, simple, funny. They even have this way of tying their hair up in a sloppy ponytail. But in no way did I treat her as a substitute for Trish. I loved Abby for her. I loved her eloquence, her quirkiness, how she makes me laugh at the corniest jokes. I loved the way she writes me little notes on her rainbow-colored post-its. I loved the way she dries my back off with a towel after every basketball game. I loved the way she took care of me...And I loved her for she loved me back. But every story must come to an end. Ours lasted until my family decided to leave for a better life. Abby didn't approve of me leaving her behind. She had separation issues. Her father left them when she was 7. She had guarded her heart from getting too close ever since. It was hard to let her know I would be doing the same thing her father did. So I tried to break it as gentle as I could. We tried compromising--write letters or emails as often, talk on the phone for hours. But technology can only do so much. After three months of being away, her final email came. She admitted she wasn't entirely ready for this. That we both have separate roads to take now. Her decision somehow brought relief. Not that I no longer loved her but because I loved her enough not to hurt her. I already broke her heart by leaving. The least I can do was give her what she wanted. We parted ways with open air. We agreed to remain friends. And we still are. I sometimes stumble upon her email and find myself struck by her last two worsd. Two very familiar words, "Goodbye, Tom." Another goodbye said, another love lost. But what bothered me more was how the first time I heard it resounded more.
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I got too tired of my swim-stare blankly-sleep routine by the third day. Besides, I was getting too much tan than I intended, so I decided to pack up and return back to the city. The drive was faster this time.
Going to the beach alone has its ups and downs. It gives you a chance to to be at peace and the time by yourself is cleansing in more ways than one. But it also makes you too lazy to plan leaving you with buckets of sand on your clothes and an empty, angry stomach. I don't even know when my last meal was--not counting, of course, the gallons of seawater I must've drunk. So right before I turned at the last corner to the hotel, I stopped by the famous golden arches. The Northern Star, my tummy grumbled. I got out of my car and headed towards the door. This is why McDonald's has a 6% increase in share value this year. Simply put, nothing beats the convenience and cheap prices of fast food. Though my mom continuously nags Jenny and I about how bad junk food is for our health, I still crave for a juicy double cheeseburger, crunchy fries and a large cup of soda, every now and then. Ironic as it sounds, but it's actually comfort food for me. While waiting for my burger, I nibbled on a fry, put out my palm as the lady behind the register handed me my change. I was halfway through my third fry when the rest of my meal came. I took the food to go to avoid being ticketed. I wasn't sure I had parked at the right spot. I would have opted for a drive thru had this branch offered it. Unfortunately, I was left with no other choice. So soon as my food was ready, I immediately went for the door, fumbling my pocket for the keys. I was such in a hurry that I forgot to look where I was going. And before I reached the exit, I accidentally bumped into someone. I said sorry and checked to see if she was okay. As her face lit up a smile, I felt my knees weaken. I've seen that dimpled smile from years back. It was Trish.
My face turned from pale to red almost instantaneously. "Tom!" she exclaimed. The moment I heard her say my name, I could feel my cheeks heat up and blush. It was too embarrassing. If Vic was there with his camera he can sell that photo to America's Dorkiest Moments and win hands down.
I almost forgot how to speak. For the first time in my life, I was at a loss for words. It took me about two minutes to regain consciousness from the trance and finally replied,
"Trish! I didn't see you. I'm sorry to bump into you like that. I wasn't looking. Are you hurt? I'm really sorry. I..."
"Stop apologizing Tom. I'm fine." she offered. "So how are you? When did you get back?"
Her eyes filled with surprise eager for my answer.
"I'm good! I arrived about a week ago. Two more weeks left and I'm off to another 16 hour flight back home. How have you been?"
"Well, I work now. I'm one of the editors for a national magazine. My office is just a few blocks away from here. I'm out for lunch so I decided to eat here." She pointed at the bag I held, "double cheesburger I suppose?"
I smiled and nodded.
"You guessed right. And I believe you're having chicken nuggets for lunch, right?"
"You know me too well." She laughed admittedly.
Funny how eight years seemed untouched. Or was this the only thing that remained? She checked for the time, cuing for my exit.
"I'm sorry to keep you. I have to go too. I still haven't figured how parking goes out here and if I don't leave soon, I think a run-in with an officer will be part of my vacation." I said, peering out the glass door keeping my eyes on the Altis.
"Yeah, sure. I'm sorry, it's just that I have less than an hour to get back to work. And the lines are starting to fill in...We should meet up again, sometime." she suggested.
"Definitely!" I let out quickly. "Are you free tomorrow night?"
She thought about her schedule and came up with dinner the day after. She's tied up with a meeting tomorrow afternoon and was not sure what time it'll end. We exchanged cellphone numbers and said our goodbyes. She fell in line and I finally made my way to the door. I paused. Pinched myself and turned to look at her one more time. There she was. Standing. Her back towards me. It wasn't a dream. She was real.
I took out a parking ticket by the windshield, got in the car and drove home. I couldn't stop grinning even as I got to my room. Not even the 200 hundred peso ticket turned me sour. It wasn't the most romantic setting but I took it. I took it all in. Had I not craved for my mom's "junk food", I wouldn't have seen Trish. And the best part is, in a couple of days, I'll be seeing her again.
Will we finally work things out this time? Or am I hoping against hope? In two days, I thought...In two days.
(to be continued)
